in the moderate Aristotelian city

Instead of sitting around going "oh woe is me, I never see anyone and have no social life", I actually reached out to someone I want to hang out with.

Result: having dinner with said someone + new people on Friday night.

Outcome: victory over my brain! Take that, depression!

I have a new volunteering role. I'm going to be doing admin for an education provider called CTC Training, 4 mornings a week. This is going to be really helpful in getting me into a routine, reminding me what it's like to go to a workplace, and stuff. I start on November 15th!

My brain is mush. And I am still cranky, numb and very tired. Stupid lack of anti-depressants. On the plus side, I have the pills back now, and I have a system in place to make sure I don't run out in the future. So that's positive.

I've finished watching the existing Warehouse 13 and now I'm onto Eureka. LOVE it so far.

I'm going to America on Tuesday. It's probably going to clean me out financially, but it will hopefully be worth it in terms of my mental health and working-on-my-stuff progress. Last trip for a while, at least until things turn themselves around and I get back on my feet, life-wise. But, I'm slightly freaking out about this trip even though I know it's going to be good for me.

I'm trying to show up in more places, more often these days, though that mostly means online at the moment. Once I've figured out how much volunteering time I can manage, I might start getting a little more serious about finding in-person socializing to do more than once a week. I miss having a social life!

And on a related note, I'm wanting to resurrect my Lucy Viret blog, but as is often the case when I've been quiet for a bit, I'm feeling a bit paralyzed about how to start again. (Yes, the way to break the paralysis is to just start. But on the other hand - that apparently isn't the only component needed to break the paralysis. Compassion for myself is, as always, the key, I guess.)

It's funny how I feel unbelievably self-centered whenever I start talking about compassion for myself in this place. There's clearly a Mean Little Voice that thinks I should put everyone else first. But that's part of what got me into this place of deep depression in the first place (cranky brain chemicals was another part!) so I'm not sure how useful that voice is.

That's all for now!