Entry tags:
....and now I need something to stop me from crying.
Oh, Dollhouse.
And, oh Joss.
What a disturbing and heartbreaking and brilliant show.
And, oh Joss.
What a disturbing and heartbreaking and brilliant show.
Entry tags:
I really, really want something to do.
I'm in "so bored at work" land right now.
There are papers and emails I could be sorting through, but I have no idea what to do with them, and I'm not sure I dare ask (for fear of being told to leave them alone).
I wish I didn't feel quite so LOST in this job. I guess I'll get to a point of feeling more accustomed to what's going on and how everything works here, but for now, this is sort of hard.
I have a "review" today apparently. And I'm scared because I'm worried I'm doing everything wrong but I've had so little training, I don't know how I'm supposed to do it right. I feel like I'm supposed to know everything by instinct (when I don't know something, my boss seems to get kind of annoyed). And I'm not psychic. And it's frustrating.
The other frustrating thing is, I know I could be GOOD at this job if only I knew what the systems are. But I don't. And it seems like no one will tell me!
(And there's probably lots of stuff I could usefully be doing, if only I knew stuff. But I kind of don't dare ask. So here I am on the internet and wishing that I wasn't giving my time for free to just be a warm body and answer the phone every 10 minutes. I can be more useful than this, and I want to be! Argh!)
So, that's today's whine.
If anyone wants to trade comments with me this morning, I would really, REALLY appreciate it.
There are papers and emails I could be sorting through, but I have no idea what to do with them, and I'm not sure I dare ask (for fear of being told to leave them alone).
I wish I didn't feel quite so LOST in this job. I guess I'll get to a point of feeling more accustomed to what's going on and how everything works here, but for now, this is sort of hard.
I have a "review" today apparently. And I'm scared because I'm worried I'm doing everything wrong but I've had so little training, I don't know how I'm supposed to do it right. I feel like I'm supposed to know everything by instinct (when I don't know something, my boss seems to get kind of annoyed). And I'm not psychic. And it's frustrating.
The other frustrating thing is, I know I could be GOOD at this job if only I knew what the systems are. But I don't. And it seems like no one will tell me!
(And there's probably lots of stuff I could usefully be doing, if only I knew stuff. But I kind of don't dare ask. So here I am on the internet and wishing that I wasn't giving my time for free to just be a warm body and answer the phone every 10 minutes. I can be more useful than this, and I want to be! Argh!)
So, that's today's whine.
If anyone wants to trade comments with me this morning, I would really, REALLY appreciate it.
Sad.
Feeling kind of sad tonight. But I am sort of... noticing it and letting it be there. And I think that's sort of good.
In better news: I did some good stuff today. Made job-hunt progress, worked on my ebook, and finished knitting the hat I've been working on (and darned in the ends). I shall probably do the pressing and making-up at the weekend, and then: new shiny hat for me!
Wondering about picking up the writing again after a couple of weeks' break. I miss it, but for various reasons the Inception epic is well and truly stalled at the moment. I don't want to give up on it permanently but I think I need something different to work on for now.
There was also piano tonight. Five minutes, but that was better than nothing.
To be done tonight - I want to find my hairdryer (I've been thinking about this for days and haven't got round to it!) and work on a bedtime routine of some kind. I'm pretty sure that would be good for me.
And now, dear Journalling Services, I am going to turn off the internet for the evening.
Good night!
In better news: I did some good stuff today. Made job-hunt progress, worked on my ebook, and finished knitting the hat I've been working on (and darned in the ends). I shall probably do the pressing and making-up at the weekend, and then: new shiny hat for me!
Wondering about picking up the writing again after a couple of weeks' break. I miss it, but for various reasons the Inception epic is well and truly stalled at the moment. I don't want to give up on it permanently but I think I need something different to work on for now.
There was also piano tonight. Five minutes, but that was better than nothing.
To be done tonight - I want to find my hairdryer (I've been thinking about this for days and haven't got round to it!) and work on a bedtime routine of some kind. I'm pretty sure that would be good for me.
And now, dear Journalling Services, I am going to turn off the internet for the evening.
Good night!